A Girl Named Wayne

29 August 2006 · 7 comments

Ah, spammers. You gotta love ’em. The following message was clever enough to fool my spam filter. It’s also dumb enough that I’m posting it here:

From: Wayne <himwimwnn@banesto.es>
Subject: my dream come true
Date: 29 August 2006 12:38:56 PDT
To: jdroth@fooledspace.org
Reply-To: Wayne <himwimwnn@banesto.es>

Hope I am not writing to wrong address. I am nbice, pretty looking
gbirl. I am planning ona visiting your town this month. Can
we meet each other in person? Messabge me back at gonqw@bravomailing.com

No thanks, Wayne — I’ll pass.

Actually, come to think of it: what does this particular spammer hope to get out of this? Maybe she’s hoping to sell me Viagra or Levatra or penis-enlargement pills. There must be something wrong in this country, what with the chronic penis deficit we’re running. (And now I’ve just made this entry a huge bullseye for the comment spammers, who are just as eager to help me increase the size of my member.)

1 Lisa August 29, 2006 at 13:58

Speaking of spam and such, I recently got an e-mail from Jeff Roth, offering me some sort of pharmaceutical.

2 Jeff Roth August 29, 2006 at 19:50

Well Lisa, why didn’t you buy anything from me? ;-)

3 Lisa August 29, 2006 at 20:57

Yeah, thanks, Mr. “Melt away pounds with Anatrim”

4 Jeff August 29, 2006 at 21:22

Just my secret way of ‘Getting Rich Slowly’. I’m working my way up the corporate ladder, you know… on-line spammer today, on-phone telemarketer tomorrow. Then maybe, just maybe, I will be able get my foot in the door as a Kirby Vacuum salesman… oh, the opportunities are endless!

5 Mr. Homer Simpson August 30, 2006 at 08:55

Greetings, friend. Do you wish to look as happy as me? Well, you’ve got the power inside you right now. So use it. And send one dollar to Happy Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Don’t delay! Eternal happiness is just a dollar away.

6 Lisa August 30, 2006 at 13:17

Speaking of fabulous spam, the one above is a beauty. If the address were complete, I’d say that it never hurts to ask.

7 Will August 30, 2006 at 19:58

It’s a quote, not spam. =p

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