Breaking taboo: Ask your friends and family for financial advice

Last weekend, Kim and I went out to breakfast. The only other table in the small restaurant was a party of four youngish women who were laughing and having a good time. They were having such a good time, in fact, that it was impossible not to overhear their conversation.

“My dad is such a cheapskate,” one of the women said. “Last week, I drove my parents to Salem. I had to stop for gas, so I just pulled into the first service station I saw. ‘Are you sure you want to buy gas here?’ Dad asked. ‘It’s more expensive than the place down the street.’ What a tightwad! He doesn’t get that my time is valuable too. I’m not going to drive three blocks just to save a few pennies.”

The other women laughed.

“My parents are like that too,” offered a second young woman. “The other day, my mom was giving me a hard time because my husband and I like to go out to eat. We invited them to join us at Andina but she said they’d pass unless we went someplace less expensive. Can you believe that? It’s not like my parents are poor. They’re millionaires!”

Again, the other women laughed.

“My parents are millionaires too,” chimed in a third woman, “but you’d never know it. They don’t spend their money. And they’re always getting on my case about the money I spend. I’m like, ‘It’s my money. Get over it.'”

Her friends nodded in agreement, and the conversation moved on. A while later, the waitress brought them their check.

“Oh crap,” the first woman said. “I didn’t bring the right credit card. This one’s maxed out.”

“I’ll cover you,” said one of her friends. “But I’ll need you to pay me back. I have just enough money to last me ’til payday.”

“How’s your new house?” asked one of the other women.

“It’s great,” she said. “We have so much room! I just wish we could afford to furnish it all right now.” Her comrades murmured in agreement.

“Wow!” Kim said after the women had left. “That was insane. You ought to write about that.”

“I will,” I said. “I will.”

Breaking taboo
It’s all too easy to condemn people like this as shallow and short-sighted. That they don’t get the connection between their spending habits and the fact that they’re struggling with money is obvious. It’s also obvious that they don’t understand that one of the reasons their parents are millionaires is precisely because they’re frugal. Being rich doesn’t mean you spend more on gas when you don’t have to or that you go out to eat in fancy restaurants all of the time. Rather, when you watch how much you spend on gas and you’re careful about which restaurants you choose, you tend to build wealth.

This stuff is obvious, even to a casual observer.

What’s more interesting to me is that that these young women had easy access to folks who are successful with money. Yet rather than pick their brains or learn from their behavior, they make fun of them! This is more common than it ought to be. In fact, most of the people I know who struggle with money have role models whom they could learn from — but don’t.

In some ways, I sympathize. I used to be one of these people. When I was deep in debt, I was surrounded by folks who had things figured out (including my wife!) but I never bothered to ask them what I was doing wrong. It was only once I hit rock bottom that I finally reached out for help.

Today, it’s different. Now I know that one of the best ways to improve my personal finances is to talk to others who have done what I want to do.

You see, it’s taboo in our culture to volunteer financial advice. It’s rare that a person will speak up to tell you what you’re doing wrong. And when they do, you probably resent it. It’s likely that your brother or your best friend is well aware of your weaknesses, but is unwilling to mention them for fear of offending you.

But if you take the initiative, if you ask your friends and family for financial advice, that taboo doesn’t apply.

The best $20 you’ll ever spend
If you want to know how to improve your finances, choose a financial role model and take them to lunch. Pick somebody you trust. Most of the time, these folks are obvious. They’re the ones who never complain about debt, the ones who’ve accumulated a lot of savings. (Sometimes they have a nice house and nice car, but not always.)

In some cases, these role models might be family members or close friends. If you feel comfortable asking these folks for advice, do it. But you might feel more at ease if you talk to somebody who’s merely an acquaintance: a neighbor, a colleague, a mentor. (In my case, I’ve learned a lot from my real millionaire next door.)

Invite your role model to lunch. Explain that you want to pick their brain about how they’ve managed to do so well with money. Tell them you want some advice.

Before you meet for lunch, prepare some specific questions. Do you want to know about investing? About increasing income? About cutting costs? Start the conversation by sharing your story — where you’ve come from and where you want to go. Be honest. Be realistic. If you’re in debt, say so. Next, ask the other person about their story. How did they achieve their financial success? Based on their experience, what would they do if they were in your shoes?

Take notes. If the other person offers advice, don’t take it personally. Listen with an open mind. Don’t get defensive. If there are extenuating circumstances, feel free to share them but don’t try to explain away every problem in your life. A lot of times, things that seem like external barriers to you are actually internal barriers.

At the end of the meeting, ask your role model if they have specific recommendations for your situation. Pay the bill, thank them, and go home to think about what you’ve learned.

Not just for beginners
This exercise isn’t just for people in debt. It’s also great for folks who are learning to invest, or for those who want to boost their income. When I thought I might like to get into rental properties, I invited a friend to dinner to ask him how he started investing in real estate. I’ve had dozens of readers take me to coffee so they could get my advice on their financial situation.

If you want advice about how you could improve your finances, ask your friends.

49 comments

  1. I think this is great advice — especially for big decisions! I’ve been surprised at how many people are willing to share how they negotiated a mortgage, why they chose to buy a new car versus used, what stores/websites/coupons and other resources they have for saving money.

    I try to start a conversation with something along the lines of “I’m thinking of doing x, do you have any suggestions?” If people don’t want to talk about it, I’ve given them an easy out. They don’t have to give away personal details if they don’t want to.

    In turn, I think we can pay it forward as well 🙂

  2. I have the honor of being a mentor for a young women who is like a daughter to us. She is now married and so she is “mentoring” her new husband.

    Their vehicles are paid off. Their business (1/3 of our shared company) is debt-free. They have no consumer debt. She travels and enjoys life. She is absolutely nothing like the women mentioned in this post.

    However, that is not the path she was on originally. She comes from a long line of family members who overspend and save nothing. They are all in debt up to their eyeballs. She was wise enough to do what JD advises, she just had to look outside her family to find someone to talk to.

    I’m proud of her. She still comes to me for advice and she admits I’ve saved her from some serious financial disasters. It’s a pleasure to teach those who want to learn.

  3. I make fun of my parents’ cheapness, but that’s mainly because there’s no pay off to their cheapness but more money in the bank. In other words, they don’t scrimp on the things that don’t matter to them so that they can prioritize those that do. They are paralyzed by spending money at all.

    This means that even if my mom tells me earlier that she craves a salad when we are on vacation, she nonetheless, when push comes to shove, buys the $1 burger (and only eats half!) at the fast food place, instead of the $4 salad. True story. When I pointed out to her that it was only $3, she said, “This is how your father and I have so much money saved….” It might be true, but I’d rather that they enjoy life a little bit more rather than worrying about if they hypothetically live to be 100 and need every penny to afford a nursing home.

    There’s frugal and then there’s cheap. My mom has semi non-functioning items in the house that she won’t replace. I will likely have to dispose of those items when she passes, even though they should have been replaced decades ago.

    I can certainly learn a few things from them in terms of doing without, but I cannot understand nor do I want to emulate the extreme cheapness of my parents or grandparents, for that matter.

    But from the looks of the conversation you overheard, I would have reacted the same as you. I’m just pointing out that not everyone who mocks their parents in money matters is unjustified ;).

  4. JD – great stuff, and always refreshing to see your thoughts on this site – quite the juxtaposition reading this article only days after more blather from an unnamed contributor with more rationalization of spending, spending and more spending.

    I don’t have a problem with different viewpoints and strategies – I like reading about all kinds of issues related to PF. I just prefer seeing a bit of honesty in the writing. JD has never claimed to have the answers and his writing always seems introspective…..he’s open to advice and he’s always willing to revisit past decisions he’s made. Thanks….more of this type of writing, please…

  5. I don’t think I know anyone with money, and if I do, they won’t admit it. If I had someone IRL to get financial advice from, I wouldn’t read so many PF blogs.

    1. Same here. Last night I thought that I’d wasted a lot of time making comments on GRS on a topic of interest to me, and thought maybe I need to cut down on time spent here to free up time for other things. But I realize that I come here because it’s the ONLY time I “talk” with others about PF and it helps me stay as much on track as I do. I know no one in my personal life who has any apparent interest in the topic (I’ve raised it on a few occasions with friends, only to have the subject changed). Of the people I do know who appear to have money with whom I’ve talked a little, two have had six-figure IT jobs for 3 decades each and one confessed to me that she has no savings, an interest-only mortgage, and stratospheric credit card debt.

      I’m interested in stories of how someone paid debts and became financially solvent on a normal-not-high income without resorting to miserliness or being bailed out by a highly-paid spouse or other relative (e.g., provided with a rent-free place to live), especially when the support system was shaky to non-existent.

      1. I’m on the same boat as you… my husband and I are quite young mid 20s but we’re both on the same boat on PF, paid off student loan, live on budget, saving as much as we can now so that we can do as we please by the time we’re 40. Both our parents make well over the 6 figures but have nothing to show for it except for a mortgage that they are still paying off. Our “friends” or rather acquaintances love going out to eat on expensive restaurants, entertainment and blows their money on things. I’m lucky that I have my husband to talk to about PF, but it would be so nice to have friends our age who are in the same page as us when it comes to money 🙂

        1. Sounds like you don’t have children? If so, please don’t forget your parents had the expense of a child/children. That doesn’t excuse bad financial decisions but it is HUGE expense.

        2. Sounds like you don’t have children? If so, please don’t forget your parents had the expense of a child/children. That doesn’t excuse bad financial decisions but it is HUGE expense.

          Actually, I do have a child he’s two years old and no of course I haven’t forgotten that my parents had the expense of a child/children but having children does not excuse anyone of irresponsible handling of personal finance. Their my parents I love them and for all that they’ve done for me, but there is still a part of me that wishes they would fix their finances so that I wouldn’t be burdened when their too old and have no money to cover their expenses but I guess that’s the cost of them raising me all those years 🙂

        3. Actually, I do have a child he’s two years old and no of course I haven’t forgotten that my parents had the expense of a child/children but having children does not excuse anyone of irresponsible handling of personal finance. Their my parents I love them and for all that they’ve done for me, but there is still a part of me that wishes they would fix their finances so that I wouldn’t be burdened when their too old and have no money to cover their expenses but I guess that’s the cost of them raising me all those years 🙂

        4. Mick–There are a lot of people with children making far less than Sarah’s parents that still save a portion of their income.

          Besides, my parents comment how they weren’t up against stagnant wages and inflated real estate prices.

          But everyone can always find an excuse as to why they are not saving.

        5. Sarah–
          I actually requested to delete my comment the moment I hit enter and for whatever reason it didn’t get deleted which is disappointing.
          I didn’t want it to sound snarky and was worried it came across that way which wasn’t my intention.
          I know there are a ton of variables to someone’s financial situation and good for you for recognizing the value in being careful and frugal when you are young. It’s the best way to go!

  6. When I read this post, all I thought of was, I love Andina! I just went there for the first time two days ago when I was in town for business. However it is very expensive. I used to think like those girls (and have parents like those girls) but having blogs like yours encourages me to save. Thanks for writing!

  7. I’m not sure that I have a financial role model – I suppose that this is partly due to the fact that it is taboo in our culture to discuss finances, so I don’t really know who has their finances in check! I have friends who sometimes quietly ask me for financial advice, but they never listen to a word I say! 🙂 I try to just continue to only offer advice if asked, but it drives me crazy when I see someone who’s just told me about their overwhelming credit card debt then decide to spend money on frivolous things. Oh well!

  8. I’m curious to know how you find out how someone has their finances in check and isn’t simply portraying the image of wealth via massive amounts of debt.

    1. While I found today’s post somewhat vague [young women who, unsurprisingly, don’t want to hear from their parents how to save vs go out and take someone to lunch who has their act together if you want to find out how to have YOUR act together]I think THIS is an excellent question.

      People with whom I’m not intimately involved have no way to know that I’m any different from most of my peers. I don’t carry a credit card balance – ever. I have no non-mortgage debt [and that’s only about 50% of my home’s value]. I have liquid money in the bank, and money invested for retirement. I save for things and pay cash – for vacations, large purchases [cars, home improvements] and everything else we do.

      But people all around me take vacations, buy new things all the time, go out to dinner etc. So who to ask? A very difficult question!

      I too would like to hear how folks figure this out.

    2. Also, sometimes someone will “talk poor” when they are out with people doing the same, but actually have money in the bank and a well defined budget.

    3. In my county, property records are easily accessed as public record on a website. I recently moved into a newly built development, which is upper middle class for the area (but dollar for dollar, it is reasonable, as I live in a low cost of living region). I am nosey, and looked up the mortgage records of my neighbors (before judging me, who of you wouldn’t do the same?). The breakdown on down payment amounts is:

      33% put down less than 5%
      33% put down between 5%-20%
      33% put down 20% or more

      Driving by these nice houses, I would not have guessed that 1/3 of my neighbors are barely above water on these new, upper middle class houses (these are not houses which dropped 30% in value after purchasing). And, stereotypically, the individuals with the largest, most expensive, and most ‘showy’ houses had the lowest down payments.

      I think this goes along with your assessment that it is very hard to know someone’s true financial situation. The older I get, the more I come to the realization that when you look at someone and think ‘how do they do it’…chances are, they can’t, and they are portraying a lie (or debt).

      1. That’s not foolproof, though. If you looked up the mortgage we took when we bought our current house it would indicate that we bought it with no down payment via two mortgages — an 80% mortgage at one rate and a 20% mortgage at a somewhat higher rate.

        What that would *not* indicate is that we did so because logistical issues necessitated that we close on this house a few weeks before we closed on the house we were selling in another city in order to move here, and the 20% loan represented a very short-term bridge loan that was paid off within a month or so.

        Most people do buy just about what the banks tell them what they can buy, though, at least based on the studies I’ve read. And having been through that process a couple of times, yeah, I’m flabbergasted at just how much that can be. We do feel like we need to be pretty careful with our finances, and we have something like 25-30% of the mortgage we’re qualified for. How people who mortgage themselves to the limits get by, I have absolutely no idea.

    4. Honestly, I don’t think there’s any way of knowing. I worked for the bank for 3 years during my university days and I can honestly tell you there are people who look very good from the outside and have debts to show for it but there are also those that are so well of so that their lifestyle is warranted. I’ve also seen the opposite where the person isn’t fashionably dressed but is loaded with cash but there are also those that are just getting by.

      At the end of the day those who are financially irresponsible will show their true colors when they are working to survive past retirement age or they end up giving up everything they own to cover all their debts.

  9. I used to be one of those girls, always calling other people cheap because they had a lot of money and didn’t want to spend it, while I was spending the money I didn’t have. I see things different now and now have people calling me cheap while they’re more and more in debt. I try to help a lot of them, but all I get is “I want to enjoy my money, you can’t take it to your grave.” The reason I want to help you is so you CAN enjoy your money and not have to worry about making the payments at the end of the month.

  10. Discussing one’s financial status and money practices, especially how how much money you make, your overall financial worth and how much debt you are carrying, is indeed a taboo topic in our culture. As a psychotherapist, full well knowing all that is said to me will be kept in strictest confidence, many people will not reveal such information (even when it has some bearing on the issues they are seeing me for),although they readily tell me long held, shameful family secrets, details of the affairs they are having, heartbreaking stories of their childhood sexual and emotional abuse etc. etc al. Indeed a powerful taboo, yes?

    1. I wonder if some of this is regional. I grew up just outside NYC. My family was always really open about money. I have lived in New England since the age of 17, and people here are much more circumspect.

      Or maybe my family is just unusual!

    2. This is true of my experience, as well.

      When I was in debt, I didn’t want ANYONE to know about it. I’m type-A, a perfectionist, and the illusion that I’ve got my act together was just too important to me. So I figured it out on my own.

      Now that I’m debt free and on the right track, I still find it awkward and uncomfortable to talk about exactly how much I earn, how much I’ve saved, etc. When my husband and I sold property this year, I was very uncomfortable with anyone knowing how much we netted from the sale. Only my real estate agent and my parents know.

      I do love the advice about not making excuses if you ask for advice. I don’t mind helping others who ask for help, but the minute someone starts coming up with excuses and reasons why something would never work for them, I move on. Experience has shown me that they’re not ready yet.

      1. When I was in debt big time, I let EVERYONE and their dog know it. But once I put myself back on my feet, I stopped informing people how well I am doing.

        Being broke gave me sympathy, doing well will get me resentment. It’s very hard to find someone who is genuinely happy for someone who is doing well. Kind of sad.

        I had no mentor either, I learned it all on my own.

    3. I find it interesting that it is such taboo to talk about money since people probably have an idea about your financial situation anyways. All your peers know what you and/or your spouse do for a career. In addition, they can see the car you drive, the house you own, the clothes you wear, etc. Yes, you may fool them in some areas, but as a whole, they probably know ballpark where you are financially. They probably know if you are living outside your means, or they probably know if you are squirreling the money away in savings.

      It is similar to not talking about your weight or age. People may not know if you weigh exactly 150 lbs, but they know you don’t weigh 125, and they know you don’t weight 175. People may not know you are 43, but they know you aren’t 36, and they know you aren’t 50.

      Is protecting the details of your finances that important, as people know roughly where you are financially anyways?

  11. I often tell people how I have gotten on track with our money and our recent success to see if they will bite, typically the conversation goes elsewhere. People just don’t like to money. It is rewarding to be able to help someone get on track. I have had the opportunity a few times with family members.

  12. It took me a long while to find someone outside my family to talk about finances with. I knew my family managed finances responsibly because they helped me leave college with no debt. This help came from my parents and grandparents, no of whom had high paying jobs, but great habits. It was good family teasing that my grandmother’s gifts always came in a cracker box and were often from goodwill. When I came back from college and was going to be earning my own full-time income, my father showed me the budget binder he and my mother created and used for many years. Beacause of these good examples and others I feel a responsibility to my nieces education.

    To those girls judging the spending habits of their parents, I think readers of GRS realize its how you spend it that determines what you keep, but also it takes different factors to make people feel secure. My mother is one of seven children and it took a long time for her to feel comfortable spending in certain areas. So I don’t brush off her feelings even if its only $2, because it’s also her comfort and security, real or imagined. It’s her money and she must feel comfortable before anything can occur.

  13. Yup, that’s my niece and her husband.

    Last X-mas I suggested they read “ALL YOUR WORTH” and they both pointed at the other person to read the book. Hmmm…. Then in February for my niece’s b-day, I bought her the book and gave her my copy Suze Orman’s WOMEN AND MONEY. I also put together a binder of articles on basic finance, retirement home ownership and other finance books she could borrow from the library. I also created for her a spreadsheet to keep track of her spending. After tracking her expenses through March she gave up. (I saw the results up to March and it was SCARY)

    It is now August, and she has not read one chapter from any of the books or a single article. But she has been a busy girl going to weddings, the World Cup with her husband and spending money and never looking at eachother wondering if they can afford this, all the while still looking for a job.

    She has now found a position (as a teacher) but it might only be for a year. Combined, they now earn $150K a year, and are drowning in debt and have no desire at all to change anything. But they bitch about how hard their life is, how they live in a home bought by her father (who has money of course) and who never thought her anything about finances, how they hate the cheap neighborhood and wants to move away, and for her father to buy her another home but this time she wants to be on the title, etc.

    Sad, because they both have potential, but the fact that they know both their parents have money and will keep their asses from hitting the pavement is why they won’t change or learn how to be responsible with their money.

    1. Sadly, providing this information to people who are not ready to hear the message does little good. In fact, it can make you look preachy and could even create a rift. I’d lay off with the suggested reading and just try to lead by example very, very quietly. It may or may not help them, but it will most certainly help you.
      Even J.D. has said that it wasn’t until he hit rock bottom that he was open to the message.

  14. Great post, JD. I especially like the advice to take someone, who you know is wise with money, out for a meal so you can pick their brain.

    Luckily, although my biological parents were not great with money, I grew up with a man (my stepfather) who was very frugal and invested wisely. He became incredibly successful (yet, still remained humble and frugal) while I was still young and because of that, I gravitated toward his approach to finances.

    Now, as my wife and I build a family and slowly acquire wealth, I look to him and know that the fact that we’re doing well is due in large part to the financial lessons I learned from him over the years.

  15. An enjoyable read. Thanks JD.

    I think the key is finding the right person to take to lunch. In my experience, the people I know who talk about money and investing likely know the least about it. They talk a big talk, but when it comes down to it, they are really speculators and not investors.

    Those that are financially successful tend to keep it to themselves and fly under the radar. See The Millionaire Next Door….

  16. Years ago Ann Landers was read by almost everyone and discussed often. I remember her getting a letter from someone who complained how her friend was always making comments about having to be careful about what she got for lunch because she had gotten five pounds overweight. She thought the friend just did that to make her feel bad because she was more like fifty pounds overweight.

    Ann told her she was wrong. It was just that her friend was not fifty pounds overweight because she didn’t let herself get more than five pounds overweight.

    I think it is the same with money. These young ladies criticized their parents but the parents had it right. Watch your pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves, as the old saying goes.

    It is not that you have to be cheap, but you have to be aware and plan purposely to spend within your means. As you say, it may seem obvious to those of us who do pay attention, but unfortunately we seem to be in the minority.

  17. Having an econ Phd is probably a bit like being a medical doctor… I get to hear all sorts of personal things from other people when they find out what I do for a living. I live in an no-taboo zone when it comes to money.

  18. That story makes me want to laugh and throw up at the same time. Their parents are wealthy precisely because they drive across the street to pay a few bucks less in gas or choose to eat at inexpensive restaurants (if they go out at all).

  19. Have to say it’s still a big taboo in the UK too, most people don’t think it’s appropriate to talk about money – debt is considered shameful and wealth even more shameful!

    I’d love a role model, but in real life I’ve never come across anyone open with their finances.

    1. It’s never to late to learn. I had nobody to guide me either, so I learned on my own. Start by reading blogs like this, articles and books (go to the business section of the library) and before you know it you will be informed about your money choices.

      Read a good article or a book and share with your friends, you might be suprised how many also don’t know there is plenty of financial knowledge available if they are interested.

      The hard part is to have people take the first step.

    2. I’ll echo Alea’s reply and say I didn’t get a heck of a lot of solid guidance either and learned a lot on my own. Many times people find themselves being the first to seek out a different way of living. If you begin by teaching yourself, and better positioning yourself and earning your own success, maybe you become the mentor (even if it’s just by example).

      I’ve found myself financially mentoring my in-laws by default (and I’m no paragon of perfection here). There is no one else in their family they can ask a question of that type and get some advice. But that’s okay, I go to one in-law for car questions, and another one for construction questions, because that’s their expertise, so I have no problem helping them if asked.

      I will also say, just because you don’t have a mentor now, doesn’t mean one won’t present themselves down the road, especially as you become more successful on your own and know what type of help you’re looking for.

  20. As someone above mentioned, there’s a difference between being frugal and cheap. My FIL can be really cheap depending on what he’s spending his money on. I remember one year, he was complaining to me about having to pay $180K in capital gains tax due to some stock options he cashed in (had to be around $ 1 million in value). That same year we had our 3rd child. My FIL told us that due to their now being 3 grandkids, he’d have to cut the Christmas gifts limit from $30 to $25 per kid. We had to laugh.

  21. Wow, you think they would have realize WHY their parents were all millionaires after they all came to the same conclusion. Kind of funny to hear, thanks for sharing!

  22. To everyone who despairs of finding a mentor, I’d recommend the forum here and the one over at MMM, which is even bigger. There are a ton of folks who will answer your questions. You can ask specific questions, post case studies, keep an online journal and much more. The posters are generally most helpful, because they have been there, done that. Plus, you have the anonymity of the internet. Money taboos are virtually non-existent.
    If you’re feeling all alone out there, the forums are a fantastic resource.

  23. I used to be one of those young women – decades ago now. And my parents were fabulous with money. But the topic of money was never discussed. It had a taboo aura around it even in the household. I certainly didn’t learn by osmosis. And I didn’t learn by being bailed out. I learned, as Roth did, by hitting rock bottom – at which point the advice a friend had been trying to give me for years sank in. We’re now on our way to debt-freedom – and we are talking about money in our own home – not bailing out our children. Hoping they don’t repeat the mistakes of their mom and dad. It’s unfortunate, but so many of us only seek financial advice after we’ve spent ourselves into financial distress. Good thing life offers second chances.

  24. My parents actually usually accuse me of being cheap! But they are smart with not going to the gas station right off the highway that is usually 10-20 cents more per gallon and they always advised me to pay off my credit card in full and only spend what you have.

    I usually don’t talk about my finances with my friends that much, but I do tell them I still have my student loans when they want me to spend money on expensive things, etc.

  25. People won’t seek out others because it’s too embarrassing to admit where they have got too. Once they hit rock bottom, they turn to PF blogs because it’s a way to figure out what to do in a incognito manner. After they have started turning things around, then they are willing to be more vocal and talk about it. You can bet those four women do not spend anytime looking at anything Finance on the internet though, more like shopping sites, fashion blogs, home decor – all the time lamenting about why they don’t have more money. In order to catch a reader when they are falling and ready to ‘talk’, makes me think that us PF bloggers who want to help others should be focusing on commenting on these types of blogs, not PF blogs. 😀

  26. Great advice but with one caveat…you only ask your friends or family members who appear to have made the right financial decisions. Otherwise, your just getting an opinion with little merit. Just saying. 🙂 AFFJ

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